let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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