oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
