wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize