is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I am available for nakedness
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
