She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
