Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize