I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?