I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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