If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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