I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Randomize
