What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
