You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
