O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
