I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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