how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
