I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
