Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
