I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I lost the right to judge tonight
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
