is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
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you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
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I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags