My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize