he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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