So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Alive.
So much puke
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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