Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
