Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
