I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
this hospital has no fireball
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