I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
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I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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