you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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