I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Randomize
