I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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