so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
