How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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