she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
