I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize