Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀