i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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