So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
