Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
