Just mADE A PArabola og urine
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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