...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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