YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be still, my beating vagina.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
And then he peed in my hair
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