we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize
