hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
