North Korea, Best Korea!
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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