hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
