Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize