she looked like the bat from fern gully.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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