im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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