Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
