Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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