Pappa wants mamma naked
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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