Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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